Does this picture make me look fat?

Well here's one for the "Are you f---ing kidding me" file.

At a recent City Council meeting, our elected officials demonstrated how focused they are on issues that really have an impact on the residents of the City of Jackson.  Maintaining a disciplined approach to improving our decaying City, our elected officials don't waste time getting sidetracked by frivolous issues such as crime, broken sewers and raggedy streets.  No, they concentrate on more pressing and critical issues, such as why Frank Melton's portrait is not up at City Hall, and how it hurts Harvey Johnson's feelings that his own picture from his first term isn't up either.

According to the Clarion-Ledger, City Council President Frank Bluntson asked Mayor Harvey Johnson, Jr. about Melton's portrait at a recent City Council meeting.  Apparently, this isn't the first time Mr. Bluntson has addressed the issue with the Mayor.

We'd like to report that Mayor Johnson quickly put Mr. Bluntson in his place, telling the old man "With all the problems we have in the City of Jackson and you come at me with this bulls&!t? That's a disgrace!"

That's what we would like to report.  Unfortunately we can't, as King Harvey instead took the opportunity to let everyone know that he is still heavily intoxicated by his own Mayoral Majesty.  King Harvey explained that Melton's picture wasn't going up because King Harvey's portrait from his first term (just prior to Melton) hadn't been erected yet.  His Mayoral Highness decreed that Melton's picture would be placed on the wall, but not until King Harvey's own monument to Himself was placed there (Melton's portrait will be followed by yet another portrait of King Harvey commemorating the current term).

Just when Jackson residents start looking around wondering if Ashton Kutcher is going to jump out and inform them that they've been punk'd, it gets even better.  King Harvey further told the Council that he and his staff have been working diligently to correct the injustice known as Portraitgate.  His Majesty said the reason the portraits were not up yet was because

he and city officials have been trying to decide on the right picture and frame for a portrait of himself from his last stint in office.


"As soon as we get the framing switched out and hang my portrait, we'll probably get them both up at the same time."

Yep.  The passage of time has done nothing to reduce the size of the massive chips that adorn King Harvey's non-profit shoulders.  The Mayor's pettiness in refusing to place Melton's portrait until his own is placed reveals the childish and petty nature of King Harvey's personality.  His sensitive little feelings were bruised because the Council did not vote to erect his portrait after he left office (probably because they were trying to forget it).  Now that he's back for another ride on the taxpayer gravy train, King Harvey will correct this slight to his massive ego.

Pettiness aside, is King Harvey so vain and impressed with himself that he must waste the time of city officials to choose the perfect picture to memorialize his first term in office?  Is King Harvey's ego really that big?

There are major problems in the City of Jackson, yet this arrogant, self-absorbed, Pride-Ridin' bureaucrat is pissing away time trying to figure out which portrait and frame make him look less full of shit.  Let us save you some time, Mr. Mayor.  You look that way in all of them, so just pick one.

To help Mayor Johnson expedite the portrait selection process, the DJT suggests the following portrait for both terms, as it so accurately captures the essence of the Johnson Administrations:

Brian Eason Does a Drive-By on Councilman Quentin Whitwell

City Beat Reporter Brian Eason recently penned a patented Clarion-Ledger drive-by on Ward 1 Councilman Quentin Whitwell.  The blog post, entitled Jokes Reign at latest Occupy Jackson Hearing, attempted to highlight alleged bad behavior by Mr. Whitwell at a recent City Council meeting.  That's an ironic title, considering that the only "joke" arising from this meeting was Eason's post.

During the meeting, the full City Council considered the shower-education awareness group Occupy Jackson's request to set up a commune in Smith Park.  Mr. Whitwell spoke against the request, generally citing "law and order" concerns.  Whitwell made no personal attacks or insults in his pithy comments.

When Whitwell concluded his remarks, Ward 2 City Councilman Edwin Taliaferro Chokwe Lumumba made the obligatory (and completely irrelevant) reference to race.  Sticking to his lifelong race-baiting schtick, Lumumba said of Whitwell's remarks, "Senator Bilbo couldn't have said it better."  The insulting comparison to Bilbo, a vile racist, was a blatant and inflammatory personal attack on Whitwell.  After Lumumba finished his remarks, Whitwell attempted to object to the inappropriate comments.  The chair of the meeting, Council Vice-President Tony Yarber, repeatedly spoke over Whitwell to prevent him from making his objections.  To make matters worse, SoJack's finest made no attempt to reprimand or caution Lumumba not to make such statements.

Despite the deplorable behavior by Lumumba, and gutless behavior by Yarber, Brian Eason made up a story that falsely stated that Whitwell acted inappropriately during the meeting.  Here's what Eason wrote:

He (Whitwell) and Ward 2 Councilman Chokwe Lumumba exchanged heated words at the first meeting, and the Council Vice President, Tony Yarber, got on Whitwell repeatedly for speaking (and occasionally shouting) out of turn.

Any reasonable person who reads this would get the impression that Whitwell acted inappropriately at the meeting, and had to be jerked back into line by the Principal.  There's only one problem with Brian Eason's claim:  It's a complete fabrication. 

Thankfully, we don't have to accept Eason's claim that Whitwell shouted, because it's on video.  Watch the video, and decide for yourself whether Mr. Whitwell was "shouting."  (Note to Brian Eason:  If it's easier to hear Whitwell than it is the others, it's not because he was "shouting."  It's because he was speaking directly into a sound amplification device commonly referred to as a "microphone."  The purpose of this device is to assist members of the audience in hearing the speaker's words.  For more information regarding this cutting-edge technology, click here).

Eason's claim that Whitwell was "speaking out-of-turn," is not exactly accurate either.  In Legislative bodies, it is a common and accepted practice for members to respond to inflammatory statements and personal attacks by other members.  This allows the member to ask the chair to strike the inflammatory comments or admonish the offender.  This practice is sometimes referred to as a "point of order."  Evidently, Tony Yarber and Brian Eason are not familiar with this procedure. 

Eason's blatantly false jab at Whitwell is compounded by the fact that he didn't say one word about Lumumba's inflammatory remark.  He didn't even mention it.  Comparing a fellow councilmember to Bilbo is inappropriate by any standard.  Despite having this clear evidence of inappropriate conduct staring him in the face, Eason ignored it.  Instead, he makes up a story that it was Whitwell who acted badly. 

Why would Eason do this?  Why couldn't Eason bring himself to even mention Lumumba's remarks?  Why go to the trouble of making up a story about Whitwell, when he had clear proof of obvious bad behavior by a notorious race baiter? 

Eason's half-ass attempt at drive-by journalism would be bad enough had his dishonesty-by-omission ended there.  But it didn't.  Later in the post, Eason described the Planning Committee meeting that took place the next day.  During the meeting, Lumumba showed his behind again and walked out of the meeting.  Inexplicably, Mr. Eason did not think that was worthy for inclusion in the post.  Once again, Eason neglected to mention Lumumba's conduct.  And once again, we ask why.

Mr. Eason, why did you fail to mention Lumumba's deplorable comments in this post?  Why did you fail to mention that Lumumba injected the irrelevant race issue into the discussion?  Why did you fail to report that Lumumba disrespectfully walked out of the Planning Committee meeting when he didn't get his way?  Why did you overlook all this actual misconduct, and instead fabricate a story about Whitwell acting inappropriately?

In other words, Mr. Eason, why are you covering for Chokwe Lumumba?

New Rule, Part II

The DJT previously reported that the Jackson Downtown Neighborhood Association (JDNA) did not appear at the City Council meeting on November 21 to address Occupy Jackson's demand to camp out in Smith Park.  At that meeting, only former Jackson Mayor Kane Ditto appeared in opposition to the request.  The Council ultimately referred the matter to the Council's Planning Committee for further consideration.  The Committee was scheduled to meet the following day.

After the meeting, we contacted JDNA to determine the reason for JDNA's silence.  Specifically, we asked the following questions: (1) What is JDNA's position as to the occupiers' demands to camp out overnight in Smith Park, and (2) Whether JDNA had communicated its position to the City Council.

We got a response shortly after 9 a.m. on November 22.  The response was that the JDNA had not taken a position one way or the other.  Sometime between 9 a.m. and the time of the Planning Committee meeting, the JDNA evidently adopted a position in opposition to the occupiers' request.  Members of the organization appeared before the Committee and voiced opposition to overnight camping.  The Committee ultimately decided to recommend a compromise measure that would allow Occupy Jackson to stay in Smith Park until 11 p.m.

The DJT previously criticized JDNA for not appearing at the City Council meeting on November 21 to oppose Occupy Jackson, and for failing to adopt a position on the issue at all.  That criticism was both accurate and fair.  However, it would be patently unfair if we did not commend (and thank) JDNA for quickly adopting a position and appearing at the Planning Committee meeting the following day. 

Club Volume-Here We Go Again

Did you know the average adult cockroach can lay 400 eggs in a single year?  We know this because Jackson's most famous human cockroach keeps hatching his eggs downtown.

The latest clusterfuck business venture is Club Volume.  Consider this an open forum on the new club, located at 206 West Capitol Street.  What do ya'll know about these miscreants young entrepreneurs?

The DJT has a few questions:

1.  Is this a Chip Matthews production?

2.  If so, is the slimeball going to have the stones to admit it's his place?

3.  Who is "DVDJ Clover?"

4.  Is Mr. Clover a resident of the City of Jackson?  If so, does Mr. Clover live downtown?

5.  What do you get when you take a lame white dude and give him a street name?

6.  Is Club Volume gonna bring some uptown to downtown?

7.  Who is Elizabeth Peabody Smith and what, if any, connection does she have to this club?

8.  Will Club Volume have a delousing station and penicillin vending machine in case Chip drops by to visit the club he "doesn't" own?

Let 'er rip.